Bart the Bear has his trainer's entire head in his mouth.

Terrible Ideas

by

Dan Jewett

Kilroy is watching you.

First Paragraph:

“Oliver Wendell Holmes, Jr. was an officer in the Union Army. He stood six feet three inches tall and had a soldierly bearing. In later life, he loved to use military metaphors in his speeches and his conversation; he didn't mind being referred to good-naturedly as Captain Holmes; and he wore his enormous military mustaches until his death in 1935, at the age of ninety-three. The war was the central experience of his life, and he kept its memory alive. Every year he drank a glass of wine in observance of the anniversary of the battle Antietam, where he had been shot in the neck and left, briefly behind enemy lines, for dead."

—Louis Menand, The Metaphysical Club: A Story of Ideas in America


First Paragraph:

“I've been taught bloodstones can cure a snakebite, can stop the bleeding—most people forgot this when the war ended. The war ended depending on which war you mean: those we started, before those, millennia ago and onward, those which started me, which I lost and won—these ever-blooming wounds."

—Natalie Diaz, Post Colonial Love Poem

Natalie Diaz writes of her heritage, her connection to earth and water, and her lovers, as if they are all part of the same emotional (erotically charged) experience. The synthesis is eloquent and moving.

Pulitzer prize for Poetry, 2021

—Natalie Diaz, Postcolonial Love Poem


First Paragraph:

“IN THE MYRIADIC YEAR OF OUR LORD—the ten thousandth year of the King Undying, the kindly Prince of Death!—Gideon Nav packed her sword, her shoes, and her dirty magazines, and she escaped from the House of the Ninth."

—Tamsyn Muir, Gideon the Ninth: Locked Tomeb 1


First Paragraph:

“When we were new, Rosa and I were mid-store, on the magazines table side, and could see through more than half of the window. So we were able to watch the outside – the office workers hurrying by, the taxis, the runners, the tourists, Beggar Man and his dog, the lower part of the RPO Building. Once we were more settled, Manager allowed us to walk up to the front until we were right behind the window display, and then we could see how tall the RPO Building was. And if we were there at just the right time, we would see the Sun on his journey, crossing between the building tops from our side over to the RPO Building side."

—Kazuo Ishiguro, Klara and the Sun


Blurry black and white photo of a bare twig on a tree.

To give mind to machines, they are calling it
out of the world, out of the neighborhood, out of the body.
They have bound it in the brain, in the hard shell
of the skull, in order to bind it in a machine.
From the heron flying home at dusk,
from the misty hollows at sunrise,
from the stories told at the row’s end,
they are calling the mind into exile
in the dry circuits of machines.

—Wendell Berry, collected in The Peace of Wild Things and other Poems


First Paragraph:

"O anti-verdurous phallic were't not for your pouring weight looming in tears like a sick tree or your ever-gaudy-comfort jabbing your city's much wrinkled sky you'd seem an absurd Babel squatting before mortal millions"

—Gregory Corso, Gasoline


A man crossing a busy street with his eyes closed and wearing headphones.

Couldn't row this morning so I took a long looping walk through downtown. I think my walking playlist is getting pretty good. It's big enough now that putting it on shuffle and heading out is starting to provide surprises.

It did occur to me that with my luck, I'll get hit by a car and bystanders will catch me with I Can't Wait by Nu Shooz blaring out of my earbuds.

What can I say? It puts pep in the step.


Photo shows a flagpole in the distance with anU.S. flag standing straight out from a strong wind.

Wind's a bit brisk today.

Every morning @5 am, I look out my kitchen window to check this flag. I can see it even at night.
I check for two things.

  1. Does it look like it does in this photo? (Straight out, wind from the south.)
  2. Is it a Chinese or Russian flag?

If the answer to both of these questions is no, I proceed with my day as normal and head for the river.


Disarray

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