Bart the Bear has his trainer's entire head in his mouth.

Terrible Ideas

by

Dan Jewett

All posts tagged as: my-big-mouth

With the exception of the arts, humans having opposable thumbs surely represents the biggest waste of opportunity and potential in the universe.


Marjorie Taylor Green declared yesterday, with maps of southeastern US as props, that Democrats are capable of controlling the weather and that they used this power to wreak havoc and destruction on the red state havens of their enemies.

I must thank her for erasing the last tiny vestiges of belief I clung to in the gravitas of responsible leadership. I’m not naive but I desperately wanted to believe that being close to the highest levels of power in our democracy would inspire some level of seriousness and sense of duty.

No. The only person stupider than MTG is me.

Original Tweet

Newsweek reporting


I began to move towards zero carbohydrate consumption earlier this year. It was not sudden and I had dallied and experimented with the concept for a while before that. I experienced periods of low-carb intake followed by periods of complete loss of appetite control. The intensity of the binge-eating was alarming and prompted me to be more serious about the experiment.

Read more…


“I have a concept of a plan,” resonates so much with me and let’s be real, everyone, because well,…guilty as charged.
But I can own that I procrastinate and that my personal failings are often the source of my anxiety and lack of focus and direction. The Republican candidate lacks the ability for any such self-reflection and therefore also has only “a concept of a man.”
Which concept is severely broken.


Up early to make sure I experience all the satisfaction of the day after. The day after Kamala Harris handed that shit talking bridge-troll the one part of his body that isn’t the color of dried apricot.


And here we sit. Making everything better with this advanced animation of how broken the web is. #pleaseusetext

Screenshot of progress widget stuck at 99% complete.
Verifying my identity is a painstaking process.

Imagine what it would feel like to achieve the position of utmost authority and recognition on your planet and then reward yourself by making sure there wasn’t one single person anywhere that didn’t know you were a total ass.

He is a golem existing only on the energy of his own self loathing.


Would someone in Texas law-enforcement please invite Ken Paxton to an extended stay away from other humans? He seems to be pleading for it.


Row of colorful rental bikes extends in a curve into the distance.

You don’t always have to have your own.

Scream about losing your liberty and freedom. Fling the words communism and socialism into decontextualized rants about the benefits of capitalism.

We know what word really scares you. Your night terror word. A word that everyone understands.

Sharing.


Feeling pretty good about what Kansans did last night.
No.
No to cruelty.
No to control of the many by the few.
And for many of us, no to primitive ideologies that destroy the essence of our humanity.


A warrior stands alone with his sword, facing an oncoming charge by soldiers on horseback.

Don't worry. I got this.

I understand everything I read.

Loneliness builds character.

A fiscally based environmental policy is smarter than an environmentally based fiscal policy.

Lima beans have any redeeming qualities.

Misty Copeland is real.


“So mom. My boyfriend took all of my money, wrecked my car, and gave me three different kinds of STDs.”
M: “Oh dear! I’m so sorry!”
D: “… I can’t wait for you to meet him!”

—Republicans, apparently.


Photo of smiling Stacey Abrams

Stacey Abrams.

Among my many faults, I count a certain baseline cynicism as one I would like to overcome.

I can excuse myself to some extent by pointing out that many humans I share this planet with seem capable of a never-ending stream of selfishness and awful behavior.

But then, a fellow human steps up and gives the lie to all my negativity.

It’s a shame that news of the moronic exploits of our nation’s worst citizens, and the leaders who manipulate them into those behaviors, so often overshadows the heroism and faith of someone like Stacey Abrams.

What Ms. Abrams and her organization Fair Fight Action accomplished in Georgia last week, and in the many months of work leading up to the Georgia election run-offs, is the sort of accomplishment that should not be quickly forgotten.

You can dress up like a nut job, scream and yell and hurt people, smash windows and furniture, and call for the blood of your opponents, or, you can be a true patriot and work to make people’s lives better.

Stacey Abrams believes in our democracy and she has demonstrated that by doing the real work of trying to preserve it. I love her for that, and I love her for keeping my cynicism at bay.

We can and should learn from her example.


Disarray

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